Tuesday, November 2, 2010

november blue

november blue is the name of a beautiful song
by one of my favorite bands, the avett brothers.


and it's the way i'm feeling these days...

this kind of post i don't know how to write.

my instinct is to hide, close in on myself. but remembering from experience it's not really the way to feel better.

sharing is. and dear friends, even though i won't bore you with the details here, i know my sadness is safe with you. thank you for being here and for the words i know you'll say.


'My parents taught me to learn when I miss
Just do your best
Just do your best
It's the only way to keep that last bit of sanity
Maybe I don't have to be good but I can try to be
At least a little better than I've been so far'
from the avett's, lyrics i like.

this photo was taken on sunday, speeding home on the highway, from my mom's. i can't believe it's not blurry. i really like it.

there are some other things i want to photograph and share, my anniversary gift and some knitting i finished. hopefully i can get to it soon.

lori

23 comments:

  1. Dearest Lori,
    Whatever you're going through behind those little doors, know that you are loved and thought of across the way. BIG hugs.

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  2. its prob just a change of weathr or somethin hopefull you make it through

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  3. lori,this is a stunning photo. it's as though the universe let itself be your reflection.

    my darling sf, whatever, whenever, whyever, however, look who's walking right beside you.

    love
    kj

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  4. I know you went to see your mom and that might have been hard and sad. I can relate..oh yes. it SO helps to be able to talk about it, write about one's fears and sadness. and laugh about the fun silly times too.

    love the photo lori, it's quite magical.

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  5. There is a time for everything under the heavens, a time to mourn and a time to weep, but also a time to lift your face again and see the sun. We are all in a row of ancestors and one day will BE one. But we live now and should enjoy the life we have. We cannot change that of others, not even of the ones we love.
    November is the month of remembering, of thinking back, and we need such times, but soon the candle and cookie times will return. Love and hugs to you!

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  6. Sending you hugs. We are but human and with that come times of sadness. Whatever it is, know you are loved and have touched many lives xx

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  7. beautiful photograph - moody blue too - also a band :) dont be blue though Lori even though its a beautiful colour x cant wait to see the anniversary present and the new knitting projects, hugs Vxx

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  8. When sadness washes over me sometimes I just sit with it a while. I don't like sadness or anger. They both make me feel uncomfortable, but I do know we all go through it many, many times on this journey.

    You were taught well, to do your best. That's the most any of us can do. That, and to keep showing up. It's so hard when things we want to "fix" are totally out of our control no matter our intentions.

    I think you have a huge family out here who are all holding your hand as well as giving you space.
    We'll all be here when you're ready to share or not share.

    Like Piglet, who said..."Pooh?"

    "yes Piglet?"

    "Nothing. I just wanted to be sure of you."

    That has always tugged at my heart, but sometimes it's just enough knowing you're not alone.

    xoxo
    Love,
    Lo♥

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  9. Always remember that you are truly loved by many.....including ALL of your Blogging Family.... we have all expereinced great pain and sadness at one time or another...and we will be here for you if you need us.

    Your Mum is a beautiful lady.... you are a loving daughter....you do the very best you can for her.
    In her heart, she knows this.

    Love and Strength to you, my California Friend!

    ♥ Robin ♥

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  10. Hugs and more hugs and than more. xoxo

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  11. Hi there Lori!
    Home from traveling the USA and want to tell you ~ whatever is making you sad, embrace it if you can - walk through it - no matter how long it takes. You WILL be OK. The photo is the proof you need (no blurs.)

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  12. Sadness is just another visitor in your home. Welcome it in, feed it, give it the attention it's asking for, and when it is time, it will leave of its own accord.

    I used to try so hard to fix the sadness and grief that sometimes came in. I'd hide away, ashamed of why I felt so sad, and ended up feeling even more lonely and sad than before.

    I think this poem sums it up perfectly:

    "The Guest House"

    This being human is a guest house.
    Every morning a new arrival.

    A joy, a depression, a meanness,
    some momentary awareness comes
    as an unexpected visitor.

    Welcome and entertain them all!
    Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
    who violently sweep your house
    empty of its furniture,
    still, treat each guest honorably.
    He may be clearing you out
    for some new delight.

    The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
    meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.

    Be grateful for whatever comes.
    because each has been sent
    as a guide from beyond.

    -- Rumi,
    translation by Coleman Barks


    Happy days will come again. They always do, in the ebb and flow of life, dear Lori.

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  13. Sending you many hugs. ....the sadness...it will pass.

    Beautiful horizon line on your fabulous photo!

    Thank you for your sweet comments on my blog. ♥

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  14. Oh Lori,
    I'm so sorry you're in a sad place, and that there is unrest in your heart.

    Whatever it is it will pass, but like someone said, it's good to walk through it, not trying to avoid it.

    I'm so far away, I feel helpless. I wish I could walk up to your door and hug you... the distance is only geographic though. My heart is there with you.

    Love
    E

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  15. Lori, I hope you are feeling the hugs and love that are being sent your way ... to help ease the blues away to a golden, sunnier day.

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  16. Hi Lori! I don't know what you are going through, but here is a HUG from Maryland. Put it in your pocket, just in case you need one today. xox!! Pam

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  17. Oh Lori, I missed this post until now. My heart is with you on this journey, I know how difficult it can be.

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  18. Yes, I'm with Diana, I am sorry to just catch up now, but know that my thoughts and love are with you...sending a big hug.
    xxx

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  19. aww lori, i'm sorry that you've been feeling down lately. i know that you are one strong woman and that you will get through this tough period. lots of love and hugs. -x-

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  20. Ahhhhh.....................that photo says it all Sweetie.

    I don't know what is easier...to lose them slowly or to lose them quickly. Both journeys are hard for different reasons. The pain is better out than in, that I am sure of. Love and gentle hugs to you. Oops! and a hankie. ♥

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  21. Beautiful picture.
    So sad to see you are sad, but sometimes you just feel like that. Just a part of life .......
    I hope you can just feel my virtual hug from a stormy place across the ocean♥

    Hope you will be OK!
    love M

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xoxo lori